


we'll see creation come undone

by Kazemachi_Jet



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Canon Divergence, F/F, Gem kissing, basically i'm putting a lot of headcanons in this too, slow relationship build
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-05-23
Updated: 2016-05-23
Packaged: 2018-06-10 05:16:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 9,838
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6941386
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kazemachi_Jet/pseuds/Kazemachi_Jet
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>lapis and peridot being gay p much, also there's kind of a plot, also i suck at summaries and i apologize and you should actually just go read the story instead of this</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> hahaha yeah after a year i gave up on the other one cause yeah sorry about that but yeah here's this, i'm not putting myself on an update schedule cause tbh that's what really killed me last time
> 
> i just wanted to write gem kissing and headcanons and lapis and peridot developing their cute gay so this is a canon divergence i guess? breaking off some time after the events of barn mates cause that's mostly what i was basing all my speculation in this off of i dunno, i'm not putting too much worrying into this but it kinda has a plot, expect holes cause making this a perfect storyline isn't my main concern, i started writing this like two months ago in a hiatus-induced unquenchable thirst for lapidot so characterization might be a bit off but I Tried, also this is not being beta'd
> 
> enjoy this i guess

After the Diamond Wars, there had been a lot to repair. Extensive damage had been done to the temple and surrounding beach. The fight had been hard for the Crystal Gems, and Lapis Lazuli who remained unaffiliated but fought faithfully by their side as an ally anyways. Her assistance was what kept Beach City and its citizens safe, her actions washing the largest portion of the battle off the coast where she'd played no small part in assisting the Crystal Gems in finally fighting the Diamonds back into retreat. After that, they were chased into space, where Peridot and Pearl's machines helped Garnet and Amethyst manage to crack them, after which Steven bubbled them. It hadn't been the ideal battle, and their plans hadn't gone exactly to the letter, but they'd accomplished what they all needed to in the end and come out on top.

A year after their victory, Lapis Lazuli simply disappeared.

The Crystal Gems were rightfully confused - everyone had seemed so sure she'd have stayed around. She wasn't a bright ray of sunshine, often quiet and terse when talked to, but it'd been a far cry from the surly and awkward temperament she'd previously held towards them after she was freed from the mirror. Steven, naturally, was the biggest reason for this. He'd been the one to coax her out of her standoffish attitude in the first place, and the Crystal Gems - he most of all - were thrilled to have another gem around.

Why then, had she just outright vanished?

She left no note, said no goodbyes. Aside from the small living space she'd procured for herself in the back of the lower part of the barn and the few items that graced it, it was as if she'd never been there at all.

Not even Peridot knew where she'd gone, and the technician also had her living space claimed in the barn, high in the loft above where Lapis' was. She hadn't seen the ocean gem leave, and when they collectively searched, there was no trace of her leaving. There was a long time spent searching Earth for her, putting up fliers, asking around, visiting places they hoped she'd run off to, but none of the humans had heard or seen anything either. Honestly, it wasn't as if a small blue-skinned gem would be hard to spot amongst the population, so absolutely no word of her presence was hard to believe. 

Garnet Amethyst and Pearl had thought it odd. Nothing had happened to cause or open up any rifts between them, and by all appearances Lapis had been fairly satisfied with the stability she had. In the end, they'd chalked it up to her flighty nature, figuring that when she wanted to come back, she'd come back. There was no need to fret over it.

Peridot thought much the same as the other Crystal Gems, but she felt an attachment to Steven much like Lapis had. Perhaps two years ago she'd have scoffed at the notion, but both she and Lapis had talked and agreed that Steven was precious to them in their own ways, an unspoken promise between them to keep him protected. Outside that, Peridot couldn't recall Lapis talking any more or less to the other Gems... Still, she couldn't quite put a finger on why Lapis would leave without at least talking to Steven.

Steven, as unhappy and surprised as he was about Lapis' sudden departure.... He'd been very calm. It was -like- Lapis to do things on the fly like this. It was no secret that she wasn't the best at communicating, even with him. Her decisions were rash and she didn't think about planning a lot, but that's just how she was. He worried, yes, but after they found no sign of her, Steven assured everyone that she'd be back. If she'd been abducted, they'd have found signs of it. Lapis would not let herself be taken or imprisoned without putting up a fight. This wasn't like the last time, where she'd trapped herself in a fusion at the bottom of the ocean. Steven'd hoped she'd become less self-sacrificing than that at this point.

So it was a waiting game.

Garnet Amethyst and Pearl kept doing what they were doing - capturing broken gems that needed healing along with Steven's help, and cleaning up the mess left by their battle.

Peridot assisted, but she was not a brawler or fighter like any of the other gems, so instead, she provided intel on the newest gem technology, exchanging information with Pearl about old technology. Between the two of them, they managed to come up with quite a few new handy contraptions to assist with the cleanup. When Peridot was not doing this, she'd picked up teaching a weekly course for a college a couple miles away, introducing humans to some of the more low-tech gem sciences. 

Needless to say, Steven was proud of her (and the rest of the gems slightly baffled at her choice of activity), and though his interests weren't in the same vein as hers, he enjoyed spending the time with her it took for her to write up the lessons and prepare the materials.

The issue with Lapis aside, it was quiet. The looming threat of the Diamond Authority had been extinguished, and evenings were spent in serenity, often accompanied by soft music or the rhythmic sounds of machinery being worked with.

Earth was at peace at last.

\-------------------------

Summer was fading into fall, and the trees were slowly turning, shedding their calm green color for the vibrant and wild reds oranges and yellows. Mid-October, the temperature hadn't dropped to coat weather yet, but the soft breezes were enough to coax residents into raiding the backs of their closets for their lighter sweaters. The occasional early-falling leaves wound silently away from the trees, leaving a sparse layer of crunch on the ground for anyone walking past.

The fall semester for the local college had started weeks ago, and this meant a certain green gem had been making her usual walks to one of her demonstration sites. Much of her teachings were hands-on and the machinery was tested on a variety of terrain, so e-mails were sent to the few students she had at least 2-3 weeks in advance as to where their meeting location would be.

This time, on a warmer than usual Wednesday morning, it was set two miles down the beach from the barn. The lesson today would be a continuation of last week's, and the students had been prompted to finish and bring in the projects they'd been previously assigned. This was a location they'd been at before, a bus stop with some benches she arranged to suit her needs and keep the class out of the sun while she lectured. 

She herself opted simply for a long-sleeved button-up with slacks and the same sun hat she wore every time she traveled, a pair of large glasses perched on her nose in place of the visor. Were it not for her green skin, the tiny gem would look every bit the normal college professor.  
The barefoot trek down the beach was quiet save for the calls of the gulls and the rhythmic squeak of the slightly rusted red wagon she transported her equipment in. Sometimes she'd muse to herself how she got to this point, a place in her life so drastically different than the one she'd been almost three years ago, working for the Diamond Authority. The transition had been so gradual that any chance for her to start leaping around giddily for it had passed, but she was content with everything. She had a purpose now, a task, but it wasn't forced upon her, and it wasn't as if she didn't enjoy her work before - but this time there wasn't the threat of death or harm if she didn't fulfil her tasks to the utmost perfection. Funny how assured living adds that much more gratification. 

Teaching for the local college had actually been Sadie's idea. Multiple trips to the Big Donut with Steven led to the two being left to fend for themselves while Steven chatted Lars up, and they'd become unlikely friends in that time, Peridot admiring Sadie's quick wit and surprising strength, with Sadie appreciating Peridot's complete intolerance for any teasing Lars chose to dole out. Luckily for Peridot, Beach City was far more a small town than an actual city, and the connection led the green gem to her current profession.

For her longer presentations, one of which she'd be doing that day, she liked to arrive at least an hour earlier than the students were expected to start showing up so she could prepare. The walk and preparation time were also her favorite times to collect her thoughts and enjoy the time she had to herself. A deep breath brought the scent of the ocean to her nose, and her reverie drifted towards that of Lapis. 

Truth be told, Peridot hadn't known the taller gem long enough to form any sort of deep personal attachment aside from the mutual desire to keep Steven protected. It was largely a matter of how Lapis was very quiet and kept to herself a lot, Steven himself took up a lot of the other gem's time, and Peridot had been busy doing her own thing while continuing to adjust to her new surroundings. It'd never been because Peridot didn't -want- to get to know her. All this time, and though she hadn't felt guilty about interrogating Lapis at the time, she did -now-. There were a lot of things she regretted, and that'd been one of them. Despite Lapis' complete inability to plan, Peridot did admire her. She was strong, agile, and an absolute sight to behold in the heat of battle. As good as if not better than any royal or highest-class warrior, how could anyone hope to legitimately keep Lapis Lazuli locked up like she was going to be? It was a depressing thought, one she kept at bay by keeping herself otherwise occupied.

That meant finally arriving at the destination, beginning to set up her small lecture stand and organize papers on top of it.

Later, in hindsight, coming to Earth and fighting would prove to have been much more of an advantage for Peridot than if she'd stayed a plain and simple kindergarten technician. It was less of a physical noticing and more of just an uneasy feeling that prompted Peridot to look up from the work she was preparing, only to be clocked on the bridge of her nose by a large solid metal ball. Wherever it'd come from, it'd been launched fast, and the small gem was propelled backwards a few feet, yelling a surprised squeal of pain and terror as she came to a skidding crash into the cage of the bus stop. She barely registered that it could've easily been her gem cracked or worse, shattered, and she struggled to stand to assess the situation. 

Whatever'd launched the initial ball was still out there - an unsteady sway to the side took her out of the path of another larger projectile that sailed effortlessly through the glass pane of the back wall. They were trying to destroy the bus stop now too? This meant she was the target, and she had to get away, lead whoever this was to a place that -didn't- involve the humans that would be on their way soon. The only option now was to run. Being tiny was to her benefit, and she stumbled through the hole left in the glass with only a few minor tears to her slacks, tumbling to the sandy ground behind it. 

Plucking herself up off the ground to start fleeing, Peridot knew there was no way she'd be able to keep outrunning whatever this enemy was for the time it'd take her to get back to the safety of the gems' temple. It wasn't likely that they were expecting a surprise attack out of nowhere any more than she'd been, but if she could get ahold of Steven and phone him.... That is, if she'd had her phone on her. Panicked patting of her pockets turned nothing up, and the dread came down on her full force. Yelling for help would do nothing, there was no one around and even if there was, they'd be very unhelpful humans, probably useful only for momentarily drawing fire away from her, though getting humans involved in a fight was not what she wanted and she'd have avoided that anyways. 

The onslaught of balls kept her dashing down the beach, and she suddenly found herself slammed into from behind. Instead of being driven down into the sand though, she was being lifted up - she could feel an arm wound firmly around her waist, another one crossed against her chest to grip her shoulder - she'd been caught, and her shriek of distress was lost to the oncoming winds as she struggled against the grip. 

"Be quiet! Do you -want- them to keep tracking us?"

The familiar voice stilled Peridot instantly, and she craned her neck back trying to get a glimpse of her captor. Stretched out in the corner of her view was a large watery wing that confirmed her suspicion, and a blue face dipped itself down into sight, the expression on it worried and weary.

"Lazuli! You came back!"

\----------------------------------------------------

Lapis had always expected to return to Earth sooner than she had. She had very, -very- good reasons for leaving, but at this point she'd been running to get ahead of enemies pursuing her for months, and it was wearing her down. Thankfully, a gentle squeeze to Peridot's shoulder in response to her surprisingly joyful acknowledgement was enoguh to finally quiet her, and the blue gem continued their flight down the beach in silence. She was perfectly capable of running -from- the ones after her, but it required that she make no noise. After half a mile of coasting on the updrafts, Lapis veered out to sea, heading out until she reached a large buoy. The landing was graceful, their bare feet making a soft plap on the wet surface of the metal.

It would be impossible to trace Lapis out here, and at her speed, there'd have been no way they could catch up with her anyways. It'd always been easier for to evade once she hit planetside.

Exhausted, Lapis sank down onto the flat top surface of the buoy, releasing Peridot. 

"Steven... Is he okay?"

"He was when I left this morning. Where have you been? Are -you- okay? Who's 'them'? What's going on? We need to get back to the temple and let the others know what happened!" Peridot sidled up to the pole in the middle of the buoy and looped one arm around it, threading her other arm around one of Lapis' to pull her closer to the center.

Lapis sighed and ran a hand through her hair, looking off into the distance as she gratefully accepted the assistance.

"A lot happened.... There's a Diamond Reinstatement group out there. We should have shattered them all... I've been tracking them. They're trying to take us out one by one when we're by ourselves... Hold still."

Peridot stared on in confusion, a puzzled look on her face as Lapis brushed the windswept hair away from her forehead and cupped a green cheek, then leaned in to press a gentle kiss directly to the gem in the middle.

There was no time to voice bewilderment before a torrent of scenes poured through her mind, flashing swiftly before her eyes just long enough for her hear small pieces of information, the nature of which she was uncertain. There were blueprints in her vision, bits and snippets of muffled and presumably overheard conversations. Diamond Reinsatement Rebellion. More clusters? So much running. 

Peridot's view faded out, playback apparently finished, and Lapis leaned back to look at her. "I'm sorry, that was a lot... It was easier to show you some of what I saw in the past than it was to try to tell you." When the blue gem was certain that Peridot was focused back on the now, she took her hand from the cheek, propping herself up better on the wobbly buoy. 

All this new information left Peridot's mind racing - and the kiss. She couldn't help the blush that blossomed on her cheeks, but that was the least of any of the issues that were going on right now, and she frowned. "Lapis... That was dangerous! Why did you go alone? You know we'd have had your back!"

"I... I was the only one fast enough to run, I just wanted to gather intelligence.... I came back!"

"You should have told us where you were going! We thought you just needed time away, or... or whatever! What if you -hadn't- come back?" Why was everything so poorly planned on the water gem's end?

Lapis shrank back, eyes cast to the side. No, she -hadn't- thought of that. This was something she and Steven had talked about before, albeit far more gently... She worried at her lip, struggling to come up with an answer.

"....Lazuli."

Peridot's voice- quieter than the frustrated tone it held earlier - caused Lapis to look up, finding a slightly guilty expression.

"We'll talk about it later. Steven... He's going to be really excited to see you."

It dawned on Lapis that Peridot was trying to make her feel better, and she choked out a small laugh, swiping the back of her wrist at the corner of an eye as she imagined how ecstatic she was sure Steven would get.

Lapis' eyes were indeed watering up, and Peridot perked up in a slightly panicked fluster. "Don't cry! You'll see him soon! Just.. Just rest a few more minutes? Maybe? And then we'll go. Steven is at the temple with the other gems. If they're trying to pick us off solo, if they can find them, they won't go after them. Uh..." This was not an ideal place to rest. The green gem unlooped her arm from Lapis', then settled it around the slumped shoulders, pulling her close. The taller gem didn't have it in her to resist, so she hunched over, dropping her head to rest on Peridot's collar. "We'll be okay if you don't drop me on the way back."

\-------------------

About fifteen minutes later, Peridot reluctantly gave Lapis' shoulder a gentle nudge. It was true that they didn't need sleep, but that didn't mean it wasn't a relaxing luxury, and she could speak from experience that it could do wonders for mental health. Lapis seemed like she could sleep forever and -still- have the weight of everything on her shoulders. 

"Lazuli, let's go. I promise I'll make sure you get some rest when we get home, but this is good enough for now."

Lapis made a small grunt of discontent but complied, lifting her head to rub wearily at her cheek. She couldn't even remember the last time she'd slept, but it'd definitely been before she left. It'd never been safe enough for her to try after that. The enemy was so near, but she was closer now to safety than she'd been in the entire past year, letting her guard down for longer than she had was both enticing and making her mind flipflop with anxiety. Garnet and Pearl were the planners of the Crystal Gems.... Peridot had all the information. It'd be okay to leave some of the working this out to them, right...? At least for now.

Peridot stood, offering a hand to help Lapis up, which was gratefully taken.

"It'll probably make it easier on you to carry me if I'm doing most of the holding on to you. I'm... mmmnnnhh..." She wasn't tall enough. She could get used to doing things without her limb enhancers, but occasionally the height loss still irked her. "Lean down."

Naturally, Lapis knew the source of Peridot's sudden annoyance, but said nothing as she leaned down, understanding what the point was. She wrapped her long arms snugly around her waist and under the short legs, lifting up after Peridot had her arms firmly settled around her neck and shoulders.

"You're not that heavy. Okay... I'm going to loop around just in case. Are you ready?"

Peridot nodded, tucking her face against Lapis' neck. Her glasses had felt unsteady during the previous flight, and she had no desire to lose them to the wind if it got strong enough to blow them off. "I'm ready."

The takeoff felt more graceful than it probably looked, and Peridot was right. Lapis could definitely feel it was a far more comfortable way to carry, not that it'd been difficult before. Despite Peridot's reassurance, the blue gem was still apprehensive about how the Crystal Gems would handle her return. She'd left for a good reason, but Peridot was right... It'd been wrong for her to take off like that with no warning. That was a lot of needless worry for everyone to go through, especially Steven, and she felt a stinging shame at the thought that she'd put him through that.

After the loop around, the closer they got to the temple, the tighter Lapis felt on the inside. Things had changed around since she'd seen it last... More cleanup had been done, and aside from the damage to the cliffed statue towering over Steven's house, it looked like everything had been finished. Without her. With a few powerful beats of her wings she touched down, racing foward a few steps before she got her land legs back. 

Sensing the landing, Peridot lifted her head and breathed a sigh of relief, glancing up at Lapis. -Why- was she looking at the beach house like she was borderline terrified.... She wiggled a bit in Lapis' grip, a prompt to be put down. Lapis did so, and the two started the short walk up to the front door.

Lapis paused in front of it, shying off to the side when Peridot opened the door. She'd given the information... Did they really need her? Did they really need her to mess something up again? Her gaze drifted upwards to the sky. Maybe they -were- better off without her making a mess of things somehow. The complete inability to make sensible plans... It'd be so easy to just take off from here. It'd buy them time too, if she could draw the enemy away....

A hand taking hers pulled Lapis out of thought, and she looked down at Peridot as a green thumb brushed over her blue knuckles.

"Lazuli. Steven's waiting for you."

Before she could protest, Peridot guided her in behind her, yelling out as she entered. "Steven! We're home!"

"We're? Did you bring a friend over?"

Lapis could hear Steven's voice coming from the kitchen area, though she couldn't see him yet. There was a moment of regret that she wasn't actually shorter than Peridot and couldn't hide behind her, though she was still hand-in-hand with the other gem and that would have been a bit difficult.

Peridot herself was starting to get a little giddy about Steven's reaction, and she couldn't help the snicker, though she didn't bother to stifle it either. 

"Yes! Come meet her!"

Her hold on Lapis' hand was released, and she stepped behind the taller gem, nudging her forward as Steven curiously looked over the kitchen counter.

"Lapis!! You came back!"

The dash from behind the counter was probably the fastest Steven had moved in a while, and Lapis sank to her knees in with a small whimper, cautiously holding her arms out. The boy didn't barrel into the blue gem, but the enthusiasm with which he embraced her with a tight hug more than made up for it, his hold on her almost as if she'd disappear again if he let go.

"Steven, I'm sorry... I'm so, -so- sorry..." Lapis pressed her face to the side of Steven's head, the thick curly hair muffling a sniffle. He looked up behind them at Peridot, excited to have Lapis back but confused as to why she was sorry, especially since it didn't seem like she was going to say anything else.

"She's been flying a long while, Steven. Can you take her up and let her get some sleep in your bed? You'll get explanations later, but I need to go talk to the other Gems too."

"Is everything okay?"

"Everything is fine for now. Just...take care of her. It shouldn't take long." Peridot reached out, almost as if she was going to pat Lapis' hair, but she withdrew, giving Steven an affectionate ruffle instead.

He giggled, and Peridot trailed inside, letting herself into the temple.

"Lapis! I'm so glad you're back, we looked everywhere for you...." Steven pulled away, releasing her from the bear hug and taking her hands. "You look so tired... Whatever happened, it'll be okay! I'm not mad at you, really!" He lifted their hands up, and Lapis stood, following when Steven started leading them up the stairs. "I'll let you know when they finish talking, okay? I'll keep watch while you sleep."

The covers on the bed were pulled back, and Lapis paused for a moment... It was really surreal being here now, back at the place she'd surprisingly eventually found herself wishing she could return to... There wasn't more than that moment to muse about it though, before Steven prodded her into cilmbing under the sheets, tucking his MC Bear Bear in with her. He gave her shoulder a soft pat and padded off to the kitchen, where she barely caught the beginning of him cooking a meal before she was out like a light.


	2. Chapter 2

As is with most waking, Lapis heard the sounds of the beach house before she even bothered opening her eyes. The first thing she realized was that she was waking up on her own, and had no idea how long she'd been asleep. It was as quiet as it was earlier, and she stretched, eyes fluttering open. Peridot was there beside the bed, arms propped up, face bowed down and nestled into the crook of an elbow. Had she kept everyone waiting -that- long? The windows looked dark outside, that meant she'd been out for hours... 

A soft frustrated huff from Lapis drew Peridot's attention, and she looked up. She hadn't been sleeping anyways - couldn't sleep, with the troubles running through her mind. "Hey. You slept a while... The other gems are discussing some things. I told them everything I saw in the vision. You looked peaceful, Steven didn't want to wake you up yet."She grinned a tiny bit, reaching over to poke the plush bear. "Looks like he took care of making sure you'd get a good rest."

Lapis clutched the bear to her chest, making a small hum of acknowledgement. "Thanks. ... For letting me sleep."

Peridot shrugged with a pssh noise, limping her hand lightly. "It was Steven's idea. I had nothing to do with it."

"Right...." That was doubtful, since Peridot had been the one to suggest letting her rest in the first place. A soft smile flittered across her face, still a bit hazy from waking up. She really appreciated it, but if Peridot didn't want to fuss about it, she wouldn't, and she sat up and stretched her legs a bit, placing the plush bear on top the pillow. "They know now?"

"Yes. With as much detail as I could remember from the visions. They went by very fast. What... ...What exactly was that?"

"Oh.. um. It's... if I've seen or heard an event, I can show it to others. It only works with what I've seen or heard though, which includes text and other communications. Second-hand tellings don't count... Other than that, I've only done it a couple times before so I'm not really sure what other limitations it has..." Lapis shrugged, fidgeting a bit in discomfort It'd never been an ability she'd really enjoyed using... It didn't seem like something she enjoyed talking extensively about either.

Peridot looked fascinated, though with a touch of uncertainty, as if she wanted to ask something but wasn't entirely sure how to pose the question. "I...see." 

Learning the limits and methods wasn't on Peridot's to do list at the moment anyways, even if she was curious to know if it always included the whole... kissing of the gem. Just thinking about it was starting to fluster a dusting of blue onto her cheeks, and she stood up, quickly patting her knees off - at some point she'd changed into one of Steven's massive amount of shirts and a pair of sweatpants that sagged over her bare feet. 

"Steven will be sleeping soon. We should vacate his area." Unlike pure gems, sleep was a necessity for the human gem hybrid. Peridot wasn't always around when he went down for the night, but when she was, she liked to make sure she was out of the way. He just didn't function properly if he didn't have a decent amount of rest.

Lapis nodded, sliding off the bed. "Yeah.. He's going to need a lot of it, I think." Even if Steven was just going to mess it up again, Lapis fluffed the sheet and comforter out, smoothing them neatly back over the mattress. "I'd like to see him before he goes tonight too. He didn't give me much of a chance to talk before..." It was just like him to do something like that, to push her to sleep and feel better instead of dropping a ton of concern and a million questions on her. A year of absence certainly hadn't changed him, and the blue gem felt foolish for even thinking that it would. 

The two gems walked quietly down the stairs - apparently so quietly, that Steven didn't even notice them, though that wasn't much of a surprise with how intensely focused he seemed on the dogeared book in his hands, leaned comfortably back onto the couch. 

"Steven?" Lapis called out softly, and it had the intended effect of getting his attention without startling him.

"Lapis! You're awake!" 

If you asked her, Lapis would say she thought Steven's enthusiasm was one of his most infectious and adorable traits. It was easy to fall back into familiarity, and she gave Peridot a 'come with' look as she walked over to sit in the space that the boy had previously been so energetically patting beside himself, the empty space to her right occupied by Peridot.

"Did you rest well?"

"I did, thank you for letting me use your bed."

"It's fine! We really missed you, we looked all over... I think Peridot might have even looked harder than I did. There's still flyers in some of the windows in town." 

Making Lapis get that guilty look on her face and hunch her shoulders up wasn't what Steven meant to do, and he reached over to take one of her hands in his, patting the top with his other hand. "But it's okay! I mean, I didn't say that to make you feel bad so don't, but we just really missed you! You're really important, to -all- of us."

Steven's words didn't make her feel any better about messing up, or the fact that she was just plain horrible at planning things out that could work in terms of strategies that were beneficial to everyone in the long run, but they -did- make her feel a lot better about staying. It was something she fought with about herself often... Over five thousand years trapped in a mirror and forgotten by everyone when you'd actually thought you were important had put a significant dent in her self-esteem, and left her very afraid that it would happen again, especially after the friends she had now were actual -friends-. If she thought about it too long sometimes the fear amplified. These people -mattered- to her, and it almost seemed easier sometimes to stay distanced, or even run away and avoid the potential hurt altogether.

Still, she kept staying. 

She'd have missed Steven most of all, if she left. She spent so long in the mirror, and Steven had been the one to prevent it from being any longer, freed her as soon as he'd figured out she wasn't -meant- to be trapped. On top of that, he'd -healed- her, saved her life. Steven, who'd fought so fiercely on the ground, but looked past all the fighting to come up and talk to her without the promise of anything in return. In the presence of who'd fast become her best friend she quickly melted, and had no choice but to let down the barriers.

Peridot was the one who puzzled her the most, and at first she'd had trouble acclimating to the fact that the gem she knew Peridot as on the ship at first was not exactly how she actually was. Peridot was a -wildcard-. Lapis was certain at first that she'd dislike living under Peridot's loft, that she'd sooner have made her home in the temple bathroom than spend one minute with the one she believed kept her captive on the ship. She'd been furious, rejecting and crushing the gift presented to her. It hadn't been easy, but when you share a common enemy... Well, that tends to make people at least tolerate each other. Lapis was good at tolerating, at least. At first, it was for Steven. Peridot had changed, he said. She was trying. She'd willingly given up everything she'd ever known to fight for Earth, and him. Lapis could definitely respect that.

But for someone who'd apparently spent such a long time in the rigid confines of the new version of Homeworld's society, Peridot was very...spirited. She was -dynamic-. Lapis hadn't even wanted to become -remotely- fond of her, but between Steven's encouragement and Peridot being Peridot, it'd happened anyways. 

Even the Crystal Gems had turned out...somewhat okay. They too wanted to protect Steven, and Lapis would admit that Amethyst was actually pretty neat with the odd sense of humor she shared with both herself and Steven.

Honestly, Lapis couldn't understand what anyone saw in her that made them want to befriend her, but here she was. Luckily for her, they weren't about to let her slip through their fingers and fade away, that she was grateful for.

"Steven... thank you." Lapis gave the hand in hers a squeeze and leaned over to kiss Steven's cheek, then let go, standing up. "I'm pretty sure you have to get some sleep though, so we should let you do that. I promise I'll come back tomorrow."

Peridot nodded, standing up as well. As she suspected, Steven talking to Lapis would be a much better idea. "Right. I have some information to pass on to Lazuli too. Remember Steven, don't go out alone. Text me if you need anything or if any more information pops up please."

"Okay. Goodnight guys, stay safe!"

Lapis and Peridot walked out the door from a farewell wave, and started off down the beach to the barn, the sun gone and the moon hanging fat and silver in the dark clear sky.

The ocean gem was, of course, on alert. Peridot seemed fairly unbothered by the attack this morning, only giving the occasional glance around. It was silent, but not uncomfortably so, and five minutes into the walk, Lapis had calmed down enough to stop making a perimeter check every half minute or so.

"Steven was right."

Lapis raised an inquisitive eyebrow, looking down at Peridot. "What?"

"We all missed you."

"I.... I missed you all too... I don't know what I'd do if any of you got hurt. The organization is large, you know that... And that they've only sent a small portion here specifically, that they've started invading other diamond-controlled planets we've been assisting.. And that it's not enough to take us out if we group up ourselves. I've been feeding information back to the other reinforced diamond rebellion groups, but when I got the intel that they were going to strike here, it wasn't enough to just send the information through communication I wasn't sure would go through or not... You know how faulty and damaged some of the equipment is. My information wouldn't have been quick enough to reach you like that... They're speeding up activities... I hadn't seen evidence or proof, but they're probably going after the big muscle and brains that helped put the diamonds in the way in the first place... I came to help protect you all. I can't believe..." Lapis shook her head, hugging her arms to her chest. "I can't believe I was so afraid I almost left again. What's -wrong- with me?"

"You were scared? It's okay to be scared. You heard me this morning, I was terrified. Don't worry." One of the disadvantages of being shorter than Lapis, Peridot quickly discovered, was that it was hard to make an attempt to comfort the taller gem. It felt so much more effective face to face... She lifted her hand up and hooked it around the crook of Lapis' arm anyways. "The important thing is that you didn't leave. You're here now, aren't you?"

It earned a wearisome laugh from Lapis, and she looked down to Peridot as she walked. "Maybe. Do you know how much that sounds like something Steven would say?"

"I know. He gave me advice kind of like it, once. He's taught me a lot while I've been here. It's surreal when I think about having almost killed him so long ago, and now I enjoy it when he says he's proud of me. He's very.... Influential."

Lapis hummed in agreement, and Peridot felt the tension in her arm slip away.

It hadn't taken them long to get to the barn at all, even taking it slow and with Peridot's short legs. They dusted their feet off on a soft towel inside the door, and Lapis glanced around.

"It didn't change much...." Her stuff was right where she'd left it - everything was, and in hindsight, that wasn't a big surprise. The surprise was that it was clean. She'd been gone an entire year, and living on a beach tended to build up sand and dust if you didn't maintenance it. "Steven's been keeping my belongings cleaned off?"

"Well, no... He hasn't been here a lot." Not since last year, though Peridot wasn't about to say that and ruin the better mood Lapis was in. "I've been dusting, I tried to keep everything where you put it. I hope you don't mind."

"No! No, I don't mind... Thank you, I appreciate it..." That meant she could settle in for quiet time without having to go through a bunch of hassle to do it.

"There are a few things I'd like to discuss though, and I'll let you know first off that we've discussed a 'buddy system'. That is, we don't go anywhere alone. When we pair off, we tell the others where we're going. We are not to physically contact any of our human friends to help keep them out of danger. Ah, follow me." Peridot started up the ladder to her loft, but Lapis hesitated at the first rung.

"I'm allowed?"

"Allowed? Of course you're allowed. Why wouldn't you be?"

"It's your space, isn't it private?"

"Lazuli. You've seen Steven come up here multiple times before. You're as welcome as he is."

"Okay...." Lapis waited until Peridot cleared the ladder, then climbed up herself, finding herself marvelling at the sight that greeted her. In simple words, it was an organized mess. The clutter wasn't unpleasant though, and it looked as if everything was greatly cared for, even if she wasn't sure what everything up here -was-...

Peridot had settled cross-legged on the couch, and when she was sure Lapis was finished looking she gave the space behind her a solid meaningful pat.

Lapis sat down and tucked her legs under herself, wiggling a bit. The sofa was -soft-, almost bed-like, and she melted into it with a soft sigh. It felt so good to -relax-...

"Anyways," Peridot started up again. "This is based on your intel. They'll probably spend a while trying to take us out individually, first. The buddy system eliminates this. They may start attacking our pairs eventually, but we'll be paired and ready. Amethyst and Pearl form one unit. Garnet and Steven are another unit, and we together are the third unit. Garnet is leaving Steven with Amethyst tomorrow while she and Pearl start searching for any signs that they may have set up base here, which I suspect they have. That makes it easier for them to watch and dispatch themselves for easy access to us."

Lapis nodded slowly, taking all the information in. "I hadn't thought about that... It makes sense though. I may have a few suggestions I can cover with them tomorrow."

"Good. We've bought some time with the system... We just need to use it wisely. As for the humans, I know there are a few who missed you as well and would like to hear from you again. You can use my phone in the morning. For now.. I'd like you to get more rest. You seem to like my sofa, you can sleep here."

"Are you sure? I... I don't -need- it...."

"Yes, I am absolutely sure. Do you know how tired you still look? When's the last time you slept before today? Sleep. My sofa will survive, I promise."

It was very hard to resist when she was already pleasantly cozy... The material was soft and velvety against her gem. She sighed. This time, she'd have to give in.

"Okay. I'll sleep on the end, but don't leave? Just... You can stay on the other end. And wake me when the sun comes up."

"Alright. That's an acceptable compromise. Make yourself comfortable. I need to retrieve a few folders of paper, my filing cabinets are across the loft."

Lapis nodded and shimmied over to the end as Peridot got up, curling her legs up and fluffing her skirt out over them. She felt like maybe she shouldn't be indulging so much so soon upon coming back, but she also felt like she'd disappointed everyone enough. If they wanted her to sleep, she'd do so, and she drifted off to the soft sounds of Peridot opening and closing drawers.

\-------------------------------------

Waking up on Peridot's sofa was not much different from waking up in Steven's bed. The sound of the ocean's rhythmic rushing across the shore was a little louder, and the air felt different, wetter... She could feel a blanket tucked up around her shoulders, and this was not the position she fell asleep in last night. She'd flipped ends - she'd been told she was never a particularly still sleeper - but since the other end was occupied by Peridot, the top of her head was jammed snugly against the hip. She could feel fingers loosely threaded through the hair on the back of her neck too. It couldn't have been sunup yet, because she'd told Peridot to wake her up then, and she was sure the time-conscious gem would do so this time.

Listening closely, she could hear the faint gentle pats of Peridot's fingers on the surface of a touch device - at least the technician was keeping herself occupied while being unintentionally pinned down. Lapis wasn't sure how long it was until sunup, so she laid there quietly, basking in the calm. It was this peace that she hoped they could eventually achieve, preferrably sooner than later... 

The sun poked over the horizon about ten minutes later, and Peridot lifted her hand, waiting for a few moments before calling out. "Lazuli... It's time to wake up."

"Mmm.....I know..." Lapis shifted until she was flat on her back, staring up at the loft ceiling. "What did you need all those papers for last night?"

"Ah. I teach a class for the local college. There are obvious aspects of gem tech that humans will never be able to utilize, but they're surprisingly fast to catch on to the robotics when you point them in the right direction. That's what I was doing yesterday when I was attacked, was setting up for class to begin. I went back with Garnet later while you were sleeping to retrieve my belongings and tell her what exactly happened." Carefully, Peridot unfolded her legs, dangling her feet off the edge of the couch. "I haven't thanked you for that yet, by the way... So. Thank you."

"You don't have to thank me... I -wanted- to help." Lapis pushed the blanket off and to the other end of the couch, sitting up to swing her legs off of it. "You're really important to everyone. Especially Steven. We talked last year, before I left. He's always believed in you, and even back then he said he was proud of how far you'd come, how much you changed... He thinks the world of you, he'd be devastated if you were gone."

Two years of freedom, and it still caught her off-guard when she got compliments without fishing for them... Especially from -Lapis- of all gems. Peridot snorted, looking away and off to the side to unsuccessfully hide the blush creeping across her face at the praise. "Of course I'm important! Where would anyone be without me? I've always been great. I just. Needed a little push."

As much as things changed, at least some things stayed the same, and Lapis smiled faintly at the self-confident boasting. "Mmhm. Speaking of pushes, we should get going soon."

"Ah! Yes. Yes, we should." Back to business, Peridot hopped off the sofa, striding purposefully towards her filing cabinet. "Let me gather a few papers here..."

While Peridot was rooting through a pile of paper, Lapis stood and walked to the ladder, leaning down over it. Everything was clear. Down the ladder she went, opening the door and peering out to the ocean. She couldn't -feel- anything when she tried to sense what was in the nearby water, but she lifted her hand, sending a firm wave through the water to about a mile out from the shore. Enough to let anyone know she was alert and watching, but not enough to seriously disturb the sea creatures. 

The soft padding of footsteps behind her indicated that Peridot had come down from the loft, and Lapis turned around, catching the soft awestruck look on her face. 

It was still mystifying to her that people could see the power she possessed and still look at her like -that-, instead of looking at her as if she was a monster of a powerhouse, only to be feared. Steven had been the first in a very, very long time, to push past the intimidating exterior to actually get to know her. Peridot, well.. Lapis didn't think her -powers- intimidated the smaller gem. She was aware she was less than socially graceful. It was hard to develop those skills when you had little to no situations to learn or exercise them in, especially not when you were so high ranked that you just didn't -need- to do things like 'make nice' or kiss up. Lapis didn't -want- to be hard to approach for people she trusted. Rather, the water gem was sure the technician was intimidated on a -personal- level. That was understandable, when she was also sure she didn't even know how to approach -herself- sometimes.

Lapis tore her gaze from Peridot's, looking back out to the ocean. "They won't touch us. It's safe out there for now."

As soon as the tall gem looked away, Peridot could feel the shiver that ran through her. It'd been so long, she'd forgotten how -intense- Lazuli could be, as if she was looking through her straight to the very core of her gem... The thought floated around for a moment that maybe she could read minds, but logic and reasoning quicly ruled that out. She cleared her throat, hiking the pile of papers she had in one arm up her hip a bit more. 

"Alright. Let's go then."

The two exited the barn, Peridot closing the door behind her, and they made the short trek up to Steven's house. 

The faint sounds of conversation magnified as they approached - the Gems and Steven were inside talking, and when Lapis opened the front door for them to go in, they could see that Greg was present as well, looking slightly uncomfortable with the entire situation, but settled faithfully next to Steven.

"Lapis! Peridot! Good morning!" The boy's cheerful call cut through the sudden interrupted feel of the room's atmosphere, easily coaxing a small smile out of Lapis.

"Good morning, Steven."

Peridot simply offered a small wave, and the two crossed the room to settle into the spots that Steven was patting next to himself.

"As I was saying..." Garnet started up, and all attention in the room turned towards her. "We only know what Lapis knows. She's gathered a fair bit of information, which we are grateful for, but there are still factors we haven't considered. We are currently unaware of the full extent of their capabilities, or how great their numbers actually are. Simply put, we need more information. While Lapis' concerns about our safety are appreciated and were warranted, at this point we know enough to protect ourselves here. Lapis Lazuli. Though we haven't had much time to discuss the option we'd like to take, what I'm going to ask is not something we take lightly. I believe we would all benefit from the gathering of more information, and if you're thinking what I'm implying by that, then yes, we are asking you to go back to spy on them and send back whatever information you find."

"What? You're sending her away again alone?" This was Steven's immediate reaction - apparently, he hadn't been in on this particular conversation. "She just got back! If she has to go, let me g-"

"Steven, no." This response was not from Garnet, but from Lapis herself. "I'm -not- putting you in danger again, and there will be no arguments about this. Garnet is right. I only came back because I knew they were going to make a surprise attack attempt. If you hadn't been informed it could have been devastating, but you have the knowledge of their presence now. You all know everything I do, and you're just as equipped to deal with it by yourselves as you would be with me here. I can be most useful out there again." She took a deep breath, and exhaled. "I'll do it. Give me time to prepare, and I'll leave tonight."

Peridot had been stumped beyond words as she slowly realized while Garnet was speaking that they wanted to send Lapis away again to gather more information. Logically, it made sense. The Crystal Gems had no issues up to this point defending themselves from greater threats such as the Diamond Authority itself - the Diamond Rebellion was, as most rebellions are, probably small. Any threat at all was no threat to be taken lightly though, and since they were all informed that there -was- an enemy out there to be wary of, they would be able to defend accordingly. Lapis was fast and capable of collecting information in ways that they were not, and Garnet was correct that it would benefit them all if Lapis was putting herself to a better use somewhere. 

But they were sending Lapis off alone. She'd already been gone an entire year prior gathering information. How long would it take -this- time? If she was being honest with herself, she didn't -want- Lapis to leave, even if it made sense. Something cold sank within her at Lapis' declaration that she'd be leaving tonight though, and she wholeheartedly shared Steven's distress at that fact. She knew Lapis was doing this for the good of everyone, but why did she always have to do it on her own? Before she could even rationalize it, she stood up, fists balled in determination at her sides.

"I'm going with her!"

Peridot could sense Lapis' gaze snap up at her, but she kept her own eyes trained on Garnet. "You know how much information she's gathered by herself, and in terms of defense capabilities here, I am effectively useless. Where I -can- be useful is with Lazuli. What I lack in fighting abilities I make up for in being able to hack into their systems. She gets me in, I get the intel, and we get out of there! It'll be faster that way." 

However much she pleaded with any other gem to go with Lapis, she was well aware that the final decision would lay with the water gem herself - she believed being defenseless made her a burden to keep around in dangerous situations which was a huge contributor to her staying on the sidelines, but she was absolutely sure that this was something she could handle. Lapis had already saved her life more than once, and Peridot felt every bit confident placing her well-being in the other gem's hands if it was required. Now if Lapis would realize how well this would work.... She finally looked down at Lapis, fingers flexing nervously at the bewildered look she was met with.

"Please, let me help?"

Lapis knew that she looked every bit as shocked as she felt, but she honestly couldn't help it. As soon as she'd resolved to travel off on this mission, she'd started steeling herself for what might possibly be another year of the unpleasantries she'd already suffered. It was nothing, she told herself, compared to the thousands of years she'd spent trapped. To the time she'd confined herself to the fusion under the sea. She was mobile now, she had her freedom to move, and if she'd -really- wanted, she could have said no. Could have asked someone else to go on the mission perhaps, anything but actually go herself - even if Garnet hadn't presented such a convincing case to go though, she'd have said yes. It involved protecting Steven and the ones he loved, possibly protecting the planet that in all honestly Lapis still wasn't crazy about, but was learning fast to tolerate. 

The last thing she was expecting was Peridot to demand to go, and ask to help. With machinery and her creations, Peridot was anything but helpless, but there would not be that luxury out where they were going, and Lapis was not even planning to carry anything with her in the first place. The enemy was sparse here on Earth, but their numbers were naturally greater at places of operation. She'd shown the small green gem exactly what it was like out there, and she'd -still- volunteered herself.... Was she out of her mind? It was a lot of trust to put in her, that she was going to be protected and come back in one piece....

"It's going to be dangerous. You couldn't take any machines or tech with you, I can't carry it. I... I could mess up. You could get hurt, I-"

"Lazuli. I know. It'll be okay, we can -do- this."

Silenced for a moment, Lapis looked over to Steven who'd been oddly quiet the entire time - he was watching everything unfold intensely, but offering no clue as to what either of them should do - and she felt a bit guilty, because she didn't think the decision should -have- to be on him. There was also the factor that leaving Steven without -either- of them, however untrue it was, made her feel like she'd be leaving him unprotected... Just once, she wished she could have confidence in leaving Steven with others, that it was easier to -trust-, like Peridot was doing....

Steven knew Lapis was okay when she was acting on her own, but when someone else was thrown into the mix, she always ended up walling herself off to at least some extent. It was frustrating, yes, but it had to be so hard and frustrating on her even more, because in the end, she was the one left alone to fend for herself and had little else but her stubbornness to blame. As much as he wanted her to stay here, wanted Peridot to stay here, for them to all somehow stay safe together, a temporary expedition by the blue and green gems would be the best way. Here, even though he vehemently wanted to protest and just go with them, Steven knew he had things to do as well, like informing their friends of the dangers and keeping them safe....

"Lapis, it's okay, take her with you. Peridot's fast when she needs to be, she'll be okay. I don't want to lose either of you but I trust you with each other, and I don't want you to go alone! Besides, we still have an entire day to prepare since you said you're going tonight, right? And we won't get hurt in groups." The boy looped his arm through Lapis', giving it a pat. "Lapis hasn't even had time to rest that doesn't include sleeping, we can go down the boardwalk." Sadly, he knew she would not truly relax if they went, and he figured she'd consider it as doubling for surveillance. 

Steven and Peridot both trusted her, and it sent an oddly relieved ache through her akin to the one she'd felt earlier when Peridot was trying to make her feel better. It wasn't that she was afraid of them trusting her.... Just that she was afraid of letting them down. Truthfully....she really didn't want to go alone. Taking Steven was out of the question, but Peridot... The moment she'd arrived back on Earth, Peridot had been supportive and attentive. She looked up at the green gem standing there with a look of anticipation and confidence that she herself didn't quite feel, and slowly, uneasily, she nodded. 

"Okay. You're going with me. But we need to talk about it later before we go, alright?"

Peridot's instant response was a vigorous fist pump accompanied by a pleased squeal that trailed off into an ecstatic giggle, and it was absurd and spontaneous enough to elicit a small laugh from the water gem.

"Just you wait, Lazuli. Let me get ahold of their mainframe, and I'll show you exactly what a technician can do!" She punctuated this with an excited wiggle of her fingers, and her elation at the prospect of pulling this mission off right was enough to considerably lighten the atmosphere of the room.

Steven stood, and Lapis let him bring her along. "Okay guys. All the stores are closed right now, but that doesn't mean there's not other things to do! Let's hit the beach!"


End file.
